heyyyo

great fucking weekend.


does my use of the f bomb bother people?

meh.

there were some really great moments and also some shitty ones that had to happen (saying goodbye to now ex family, he made it more awkward than it needed to be)

but whatever!

i made it out alive and looking SO SO forward to summer. thats all i talk about now. i know especially on the blog but even in real life. summer summer summer. i am in loveeee with summer.

oh wait!!!

i am crossing something off my summer list already

BUY A ONE PEICE BATHING SUIT

or really


BUY A ONE PEICE BATHING SUIT

you don't even know how long i have been looking for a one piece that wasn't super expensive and didn't make me look like a 12 year old at the aquatoriam.

this is really great news because i am getting closer to another goal of learning how to slalom ski.

i mean you can ski in a two piece. i've been doing it for lifetimes but theres always that flashing moment after a wipe out

HOLY JESUS i don't even think i still have legs there can't be a bathing suit attached to them!

but its usually there.

one time my top was chilling in my armpits when i took my life jacket off in the boat. the wipe out and the show! hello cousins!

actually this mostly happens when tubing.

fucking love tubing. actually tubing scares the crap out of me but thats why i like it. and i always get middle because i am the girl and that is A okay with me. i'd like to keep all my eyeballs okay thanks.



so. i guess i should write out my list

my list of summer goals.

IT HAS BEEN GROWING IN MY HEAD

ALL WINTER


-lets start off with the easy ones shall we...one piece black bathing suit (scored for $24 thank you joe fresh)
-learn to slalom ski
-grow a vegetable garden
-buy a record player
-bbq as much as possible
-get the heck out of the city
-buy a beautiful bicycle with a large basket
-launch two birds eatery with my best friend turned baker now business woman
-tan a millions tans
-decorate my new apartment
-sangria. copious amounts of it. white wine sangria, red wine sangria, sangria party at my place
-go camping. maybe quebec. whos in?
-various fitness and health goals like eating less crap and more pure ingredients, start going to pilates, and possibly yoga again, drink so much water. take my multi vitamins drink my vital greens. sleep more, coffee less, focus more.
-to be continued.

xo

Friday Jams

soooooooooooo happy its friday!

this week went by so quickly. happy about THAT

took my car to the mechanic yesterday and walked out with a car that sounded like a purring cat instead of an airplane taking off.

was pretty fucking stoked.

who knew a ball bearing could cause so much racket.

he showed it to me after. 'Look how bad this is' uh yeah sure, so i guess its not supposed to look like that?! you could have showed me a lawnmower engine i have no idea what the inside of my car looks like.

under the hood, not my problem, thats what i say

so while they fixed my car i found a goodwill down the street. two hours of goodwill shopping is exactly what i live for.

found a pair of white sperry's for my brother, found some geometric sweaters for myself, they are semi verging on cray cray but i like them, some smoked glass cups and lots of other goodies.

i would like it to rain just a little more. a few more days of rain would be great.

kidddddddding.

what the hell spring?

whatever, get it out of your system now and lets go for clear skies this summer. vegetable growth to the max.

i need to get some work done.

pace

wooden crates!

i love em.

and i have a way to get them. beautiful pine ones, that used to hold wines more expensive then my car. 

i love that you can stack them, nail them to the wall, put things in them, on them, over them. GROW THINGS IN THEM. they are perfect. 

so in honour of wooden crates. 

i give you wooden crates! 

From burlapandblueblog.blogspot.com

From thedesignfiles.net

From emmas.blogg.se

From llhdesignsblog.com

From realsimple.com

From greenwellies.tumblr.com

From bbbcraft.blogspot.com

From graphic-exchange.com

From storageandglee.blogspot.com

yellow bedframe

a while ago i was reading one of my favorite toronto based blogs, the marion house, when she mentioned she was re-doing her bedroom and getting rid of her beautiful yellow bed frame. i can't say for sure but i may have originally fallen in love with this particular bed frame BECAUSE of her bedroom, and had been casually searching craigslist for one for a while. So when we mentioned she was willing to sell it I immediately emailed her and said I could pick it up the following weekend. she named her price (a good deal too!) and my brother and i went to pick it up. 

let me just say, this bed is not for beginner ikea assemblers. we took nearly four hours putting it together with me running back and forth to the computer for the instructions i found online. we would get one part together only to realize it needed to be attached to something else all together or, umm, is this upside down?! we also tried to make a time lapse video of us putting it together but i'm not sure that was ever edited/finished.

its a beautiful bed frame and i am lucky to have it. I was reminded of this because there is a before and after post about this bedroom on apartment therapy and there are a fair number of people who prefer the old bedroom and the old bedframe! mine now! see for yourself, and the new beautiful room that emma created is below. 

heyyyyy

so the thing about this blog is sometimes.


there is no blog.

deep eh?

so.

i feel i must be honest on here. and enough time has passed that i feel comfortable talking about this now.

i am moving out, and ending my current relationship as it was. the dynamic of the relationship was bad, it was just really bad. we didn't even like each other anymore. i'm not exactly sure what the future holds for us now but i know that i needed to get out on my own and start building something fresh.

we don't hate each other. there was only a few harsh words spoken. it was mostly just laying the truths out on the table. neither one of us are in denial, it wasn't working.

i hope this is a new start. we are going to live our own lives, choose our own paths. its tough, its been almost six years. a long time, and even more reason to not wait.

so yes, thats it.

i move into my new place june 1st.

RESONS I CAN'T WAIT TO MOVE
-roof top patio
-only a 20 minute NON HIGHWAY commute to work (right now i drive about 45 minutes-1.5 hours)
-new beautiful neighborhood to explore
-three huge bright windows
-a dishwasher!
-full authority on decorating (although I wouldn't say i was ever really told i couldn't do anything before, its now really my own vote that wins)
-living with my brother. and he gets his own bedroom!
-living in a house means no stupid elevators that break down
-fresh start x100000
-yoga and pilates just down the street

so yes. i think i had a bit of writers block this past week because i knew what i wanted my next post to be about and just didn't have the words to get it out.

but its out there now.

and me?

i am doing great.

fucking fabulous. really.

really really.

i feel excited about the future. i feel blessed to know how much my friends and family support me. i don't feel like i am alone, quite the opposite really. i feel like there is a part of me that is scared but an even bigger part of me that knew it was time for a change. life is too short. if i could count the times people tell me this i would have run out of numbers. LIFE IS TO SHORT.

i feel like getting lost in a youtube vortex of gold dust woman and stevie nicks.

bye

okay so i just opened up this page to blog and THEN THE FIRE ALARM STARTED GOING OFF.

which is semi-holyjesus-distracting. SO UNBELIEVABLY LOUD.

i live in an apartment building. this happens more then i care to talk about. stop lighting shit on fire people and keep worry about cramming more children into a two bedroom apartment.

also. while we are on the topic there is a hallway outside of the elevators (obviously) and people leave all kinds of shit out there for the taking.

this weekend there was a fish tank with the pump removed and laying on the table beside it.

AND THERE WAS STILL TWO FISH IN IT

poor fish!

at least



.....



i don't even know how to finish that sentence.

AT LEAST deal with your fish that you clearly bought as pets from the pet store and brought home and managed to feed daily and care for before today.

how?

how do you decide today is the day that you can no longer do it and walk them down the hall and not even care.

...........


the firetrucks are here. fingers crossed its just an idiot smoking in the stairway and we can get on with this blogging (non)business.

home this weekend. Lindsay.

hahah my brother just asked me if there is anyway to make microwave popcorn not in the microwave.

no.

HAPPY 4/20!!!!!

i do not endorse or agree with microwaves. fundamentally opposed to them actually. what the fuck, how can you think radiating your food with a bunch of radio active 'waves' makes it good for ingesting in your body?

i bet if i invented microwaves tomorrow and no one had ever heard of them there is no way people would be okay with them. fuck we can't even deal with plastic water bottles any more. RADIATION BEAMING INTO YOUR FOOD.

BEEP!

dinner.

no chance.

firealarm went off.

ahhhhhhhh.

so where were we. Lindsay. this weekend.

might be going camping apparently? (probably not, don't get your hopes up)(maybe in your garage)(giant crab 2?)

my friend is finishing teachers college! i will drink to that. hahah oh yes we will drink to that.

thats the lindsay way. liver obliver-y. (good one)

shots. drinks. always a water bottle before the bar. the stupid york with its shitty service and mirrored ceilings. also cab drivers in small towns are real people who aren't just rude and smelly and pissed that you want to pay with credit card. (its a real form of payment, deal with it, i have the option to tip any amount with credit card if you played yours cards differently maybe that could potentially work to your advantage)

alright well i'm spent.

actually before i go i would like to mention that today ian brought home bacon band-aids and also bacon flavoured pop corn.

we are truly related.

also blogger makes safari unexpectantly quit every time i hit publish. whats up with that?

xo.

fully completely

Here are some things I learned this week

-manage expectations. people wont expect you to do something but if you say your going to then follow through. my old boss always lived by this saying "under promise, over deliver"
-don't give it all away. the mystery is what keeps them coming back for more.
-eat real foods. or better yet, eat/buy ingredients. the problem with our food and the way we think about food is not healthy. less is more.
-there is rarely a good enough reason to buy jagger shots right before leaving the bar

i'm at a weird/great phase of my life right now. i won't go into details right now because its still all a big sloppy mess but i have made a decision to find happiness in every day. to interact with people in a consistently meaningful way. to make plans and look forward to them and enjoy every single moment.  its a big scary overwhelming step but its right, and i've known it for too long to not follow though.

i've been high on life this whole week like every day i wake up and i have the energy to just start the day. i have been excited about the simplest things and looking forward to the future. i know the next phase is going to be tough, extremely tough, i will be risking it all, all the safety nets i have built are being torn down. i am the one who is responsible for making the decision and i have to own up to that. i can not play the victim. i am the reason.

no risk no reward.

gem

words of wisdom

From mustanggina.tumblr.com

"Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are. Let me learn from you, love you, bless you before you depart. 

Let me not pass you by in the quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow. 

Let me hold you while I may, for it may not always be so. One day, I shall dig my nails into the earth, or bury my face in the pillow, or stretch myself taut, and raise my hads to the sky and want, more than all the world your return." --Mary Jean Iron

today is the perfect day

home alone.

yes yes yes yes yes.

love it.

sorry ian , but a day alone is such a perfect treat.

today so far..was great. here is a list why.

1) woke up and read for half an hour and THEN WENT BACK TO SLEEP. i'm one of those people who once they are up, i'm up for good. i'll kinda maybe go for a few more snooze rounds on the blackberry but its over by that point.
2) messaged my favorite aunt about potential hang outs this weekend and she was like what about right now, you and me mars food diner breakfast and beaches boardwalk tour. done and done.
3) finnnnnally went to the bank. thats actually been on my list for over two weeks. she was running low.
4) got my tax return!!!! perfect so perfect of timing. i need that buffer zone.
5) went to double take (my most favorite thrift store, seriously can't go more then 6 days without going back...i get withdrawl. ) and only donated a big bag of stuff and although i didn't buy anything i think that was also exactly what i needed to do. cleaning out the clutter.
6) found this:

vanilla & lime blossom scented oil. can i wear this stuff? no actually i like it for the smell in the room better. perfect for summer.

i am putting a lot of expectations on this summer. i always put a lot of goals on the table for summer but this year i am specifically going to be pushing the comfort zone. summer is the perfect season. not a lot of people love summer but i really do, i love to be hot, sweaty even. i love wearing bare feet and dainty shoes. showing off my tattoo. telling the story of my tattoo. laying out in the sun, so many ripe fruits and juicy vegetables and bike rides.
winter really gets me down. i feel like molasses in winter, layered in and stuck. always a barrier between me and the outside.

summer is freedom. fresh air and open spaces. also in the summer i have my cottage. the cottage is the perfect place to do the things above but also include skiing, bbq, and fun times with family. i need to buy some bathing suits asap. this summer i learn to solemn (slolemn? one ski anyway) ski.

whoa in real life there was a huge distraction there. facebook makes things too easy. hah. dave this summer your going to come up to my cottage even more then me. get your 60 suntan lotion stocked up. kidding you can only go when i go. kidding, not kidding kidding. and holy oatmeal rant. i'm going to call you steel cut oats. steel for short.

i have my itunes on for once in a blue moon. i usually listen to the itunes thats on the other computer because its hooked up to the speakers but today is a new day so back to mac. i haven't really changed my choice in music in a long time, and that is not cutting it for me. i am fully open to new music suggestions.

blog binge!