last week

// all stocked up on fruit // sometimes its so nice when the boys make dinner and I have 15 minutes when they are both in the kitchen to quick tidy the apartment. Its amazing what you can do with 15 minutes //

// we went home to lindsay for easter weekend. I only allowed us to go for one night, then we had to get back to the computer ..I mean city //

// but yes. obviously stopped for a bordeaux cherry milkshake //

// went to see Alt J last week. so friggen good. ∆ also so nice to get out with peter 

// on the way home. these photos are terribly out of order // 

// these balloons were a total fluke and absolutely perfect for my portfolio website photoshoot //

html on blogger to display images at the full width of the page

So I was messing around with my html on the site tonight to try and get my images to display at 100%. I think I've done it successfully!!

If something is glitchy do be a doll and let me know though....


If anyone is wondering how I did it I will do my best to explain.

First you need to log into your account and go to the templates tab...you should see something like the picture below...click on the edit HTML button

From here you are going to scroll down until you see the html code for the posts...it should look like this 

/* Posts

-----------------------------------------------

 In the posts area you can copy and paste the code below (making sure to get both brackets) ..This will allow your pictures to stretch the entire width of the post area. It also makes it resize accordingly if someone is looking at it on a smaller screen. (As opposed to adding a fixed pixel amount, say 350 px wide....this means the photo will always display at 350 px wide instead of fitting the screen)


.post img {
width: 100%;
height: 100%;
  }

good luck and if you have any issues be sure to let me know and hopefully I can help out.

plenty

Hi kids,

So Kathleen from Braid is having a contest to win a spot in her Braid workshop at the start of May. All you have to do is answer the questions below and comment on her post. I figured since I was writing something out I might as well share it here as well.



1. What is your art? 

I want to help people get what they want out of the online experience and present themselves in the best way possible. 

Right now I am (21) days away from finishing my diploma in Web Design </holycrap>. I feel its important for me to work in a small to medium sized agency after I graduate to continue learning and make new connections. My dream job would be to work in a creative environment and be a digital media producer. I see it as a professional list maker and task organizer, prioritizer and facilitator. And thats the kind of stuff I love to do. I also want to work for myself and start doing freelance work as often as possible. Ultimately, I'd like the freelance work to be able to sustain my income and time in the long run. 

I also really want to find the voice of my blog. Which really should have happened already because I have been blogging for six years and have always thought that it is completely possible to make it into something great. I've always been stuck between a personal hang up of sharing too much or when to share and how to market it as a place where I share my thoughts...and if thats even a marketable thing. 


2. For you, what is the scariest part about sharing yourself? 

I am thinking a long time about how to answer this question because I am not sure what my answer is. Small things come to mind...misspelling a simple word infront of a group of people, forgetting someones name when its impossible to retrace your sentence, having my dress tucked into my panty hoes (all things that have happened already haha). 

The obvious thing that comes to mind is rejection but I feel like pulling off a band aid. Its sharp and painful at first but it passes quickly. When you work in the creative field its important to remember just how many points of view are out there and not one of them is completely 'wrong'. 

Being authentically me when I first meet people is very hard. I find I am very polite and smily and agreeable, and even though I do possess those qualities I feel like I'm a sugar coated version of myself. I'd like to come across more thoughtful, taking the time to construct my answers and replies before I blurt them out. 


3. For you, what is the hardest part about selling your work? 

Committing to anything really specific (I have the frequently Pisces ability to be able to see merits to both sides of the argument.) Or in broader terms I am easily swayed by so many options or possibilities that I end up having a hard time committing to one idea or style.  I feel like I have so many interests and passions that its hard to say "___ is exactly what I want to do". I'm feeling a little lost on what exactly is my strongest points, and what I will enjoy the most and where those things overlap.

I often don't defend my work as much as I should -I want to stand up for it more. Especially being in a classroom environment of teachers and students, I usually take the teachers advice and recommendations and make the changes...whereas others in my class have more defined points of view that allows them to passionately stand up for their work. I wish I could have more of that. 

I'll do her anyway

wow its been a lifetime since I last posted. I honestly can't even believe its been so long.

so yes, big news, google reader, my trusted blog content curator is no longer going to be around BUT, I have a great new option.

Feedly...heard of it? its serrrrriously awesome if you have an iphone.
heres some pics ..

ok, first of all, in about 3 nanoseconds it will import your google reader, if thats what you currently use.

and right away it set up this lovely interface of my blogs to read..

and the best part - on your phone it has SUCH a beautiful look. every photo is full screen and the blog post title is overlayed onto the image.

this is kind of geeky but its cloud based so what that means is that everything is always synced. if you read a post on your phone and then log into the computer it will still show it as read. same as google reader but for the newbs out there (mom and davey)(i.e. my fan base) this is a great app. 

so what else is new? 

I'm 26 now. 

I'm 26 and i'm going to be switching to wordpress. this blogger garbage is garbage barf. 

see how easy it is? 

yeah. 

having a party tonight. 

probably starting whole30 on Monday

have a shit ton of homework to do these days

probably should be working on that. 

yeah, I'll be back with a more meaningful post on being older and dumber and all that jazz. 

I was reading the newspaper the other day at the kitchen table and halfway through an article I noticed my head was about 10 cm from the paper and I was all hunched over and just the whole posture was horrible and I realized I REALLY NEED MY GLASSES. which is funny because, yes duh, I need my glasses. thats why I was given a prescription for them and thats why I have four pairs. but in my head I've always sort of wanted glasses so I sort of over exaggerated my need for them and fantasized about needing them. but folks. the day is here. I really do need them. wearing them right now and forever.

I think its my phone that is making them so bad. I'm always squinting at it and holding it like super stupid close to my face to read it.

anyway.

I've been meditating. I posted a while ago about buying this book and I'm working my way through it. I bought some chocolate for the chocolate mediation and it was reallllllly really fun. I even had peter do it with me once and he was blown away too. its a whole new experience to tasting your food. coles notes version of the chocolate mediation if you want to try it is to open the package, smell it in, notice everything, look at it, really see it. pop it in your mouth. feel it on your tongue. let it melt. resist the urge to bite it. resist the urge of your tongue. taste it. are there new tastes that are appearing? chocolate has over 300 different flavours. let it slowly pool up in your mouth. when its all melted let it drip down your throat. swallow it. think about it. repeat if you want.

when we finished Peter said wow that tasted so good. yet he had a piece before the meditation and wasn't all that impressed. it changes your whole view.



I read this really nerdy money blog called the simple dollar and I read something that I haven't been able to stop thinking about. He is talking about the taking small savings seriously instead of focusing on large investments or making more money in a year.

The same is true for lunch. If you can come up with a lunch routine that saves $3 each day off of what you’re doing now, you’re saving $1,100 per year. That’s about 4% of the take home pay of an average American family for the year. This is saved just by paying attention to one detail and fixing it.
$1,100 is seed money for a microbusiness. It’s a solid down payment on a car. $1,100 is money that can get you through a rough spot.
Again, the counterargument that many would make is that most details won’t save you $3. To that, I say, so? If I can spend fifteen minutes figuring out a more efficient system for doing laundry that cuts energy and water use by 10% at home, I’m saving about $0.05 per load forever. Our family does a load of laundry every day. Over the next decade, that fifteen minutes of thought is going to save us $182.50.
Please, tell me something else you could do in fifteen minutes that would bring home $182.50 after taxes.

 How often do we think, oh whatever its just $3? Just $3 adds up to over $1000 per year! Thats a trip to Cuba or a few days in New York or a good little reserve fund for someone my age.
I think about how often I'm in the grocery store and put something in my cart worth 3$ that I don't really need or could make myself with cheaper ingredients. I'm not going to deny myself that item, but I want to push myself to do it for cheaper. and to think about 'cheaper' options for things that I already consider inexpensive, not just ways to save on the 'big' items. Eating leftovers instead of buying new. making sure to use up all food in the fridge before it goes bad. I feel like this is focusing on food but the same goes for toiletries or entertainment or anything.

For starters I'm making my own salad dressings. Heres my go to recipes for Ranch, Caesar and Italian.

All images from this tumblr
xox

its 16 miles to the promised land

Okay so I don't usually post about clothing or style because I really don't consider myself doing anything ground breaking or ...really have that much interest in clothing? I know some of you will think thats cray but..yeah...I just sort of find things that fit at thrift stores and buy most of my shoes second hand or in Kensington market and pants are really the only thing I spend money on. and even then, I have one pair of black skinnies that I live in and then a pair of jeans that I should really replace now that I've grown into my new quarter life body. 

But the other day I saw a few of these pictures on a blog and was really drawn to them. simple clothing. simple colours. heels? loose hair. belts. 

I need some inspiration for re-entering the work world in April and this is what I'm being drawn too. 

Source 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

Cool so remember when I said I was going to make a list every week and post it?

...

..

...

.....

HA!

...

..

So that clearly hasn't been happening but I found an old one from January so ta! da! thats what we get today. 

My wants (not needs) list:

so what else is new?

I finished another website...... LINK

Its probably my favorite so far. Although, haha, I guess I would have said that for the others as well, but this one really 'fits' my style and aesthetic right now.

Also, a while ago Peter and I and another friend Matt filmed a Lindsay band when they played at the Horseshoe in Toronto. Peter edited the videos and had a friend mix the music. I did the titles to each of the videos. It was a fun exploration with fonts and a good chance to use some less mainstream title fonts instead of the tried and true readable body copy ones. yes I am a total font nerd. here's one of the best songs (imho) Canada Wide

I was also asked by my lovely cousin Carly to create a logo and branding of her new jewellery business venture, Black and Bronze. You can see her etsy shop with the logo here. Her business cards have been ordered so I'm sure she will post of pic of those when they come in the mail shortly.

Okay, dinners on the table, we are watching beast of the southern wild tonight. xo!

Mindfulness

I was in a conflicted state this morning. I have a snow day and didn't have to go to class, which is A+ awesome. But I didn't/don't want the whole day to go to waste but I also wanted to relax and enjoy this opportunity.

For me that conflict is the worst. It leads me to do nothing. I get overwhelmed and can't start anything. Then I feel guilty for not doing anything but instead of fully embracing relaxing I spend the whole day thinking about what I should be really doing and feeling anxious.

Then I took peter up on his offer to run me a bath and started reading Flow magazine by chance. I found an article that I just perfectly needed to hear. I am making the conscious decision to share it with you and then I will decide on my next move after this.

Taken from an interview with Mark Williams in Flow Issue 1.

WHY DO WE NEED MINDFULNESS SO BADLY THESE DAYS?

...We have created a society which is very hectic and where everything rushes by. We live in a culture of achievement and targets. The trouble with targets is that you can't really be happy when you have achieved them, you can only be relieved. If you're a a carpenter and you make beautiful furniture, you will enjoy your job. But it's different when someone shows up and says, 'I want you to make twenty of these and if you don't finish on time, you won't get paid.' Once you have completed your twentieth, you are no longer happy, you're just relieved.

HOW IMPORTANT IS IT TO BE QUIET AND CALM?
I think that being busy isn't much of a problem in itself. It only becomes a problem when the bustle becomes permanent. all types of technological advances have made life constantly busy. It's getting harder and harder to take a break, we just jump from one thing to the next.
The danger is that we don't 'feed' ourselves enough. When you are stressed, you have a tendency to give up stuff so you can focus on the tast at hand. But that doesn't reduce stress. So you give up other stuff as well. And then some more. But the things you are likely to give up first are exactly the things that feed you, that give you energy. So you stop singing, you stop playing your musical instrument, you don't invite people round for dinner anymore. And you hear yourself say I'll do it next month, or next year. But in fact you are postponing your life. We never realize that today is the future we promised ourselves last month. But it is. This is life, and it's happening right now. So if this is the future we promised ourselves, why not take a moment and realize that, to wake up?

ps after I got out of the bath I made it my misson to find his book Mindfulness: A Practical Guide to Finding Peace in a Frantic World but it isn't available through the public library or chapters. Or even Amazon! But I did find this, and bought it.

BUT AT THIS MOMENT there is only THIS MOMENT

source

I have a confession. I am really liking this time of year. Its not usually my style, all cold and grey and unpredictable out there. but right now in these moments I am finding a lot of happiness.

I have time to have conversations with friends. I am able to work hard at my schoolwork and not feel overwhelmed. I am enjoying going to the gym and seeing changes in my body. I love spending time with Peter and we have been just laughing our heads off always. He's been working so much and so hard and it makes me uncontrollably proud to see that. We've had lots of friends over and served good food and played cards (Wizard, favourite game ever) around my new kitchen table. It feels like family. like home. like a great time.

This is a delicate balance. once the weather warms up there will be more obligations. more places to visit and less time to decompress. more deadlines to meet and the stress will be higher. the potential 'dream job' will be looming.

I am going to enjoy these moments because they are mine to have now.

I've realized something very important. my future planner self needs to step back. I think of all these scenarios in my head, like what my job will be, how my husband will be, how many kids we will have and in what city. my future planner then looks at today and feels like it needs to hurry up. to set those wheels in motion. I see something that doesn't fit with future planner self's vision and I freak out. Its an irrational panic because there is nothing in this moment that is wrong, just a potential flaw in future planners vision that could potentially change things. BUT AT THIS MOMENT there is only THIS MOMENT. If I am happy now, I can live with that. If I am looking forward to tomorrow, then I will be ready for it. I have to calm down, take a deep breath, ask myself, but are you happy right now? and if the answer is yes then I need to chill out.

I always have the opportunity to change things.  Why I am so nieve to think that I know today what my future self will want? I won't get existential on this matter, but if I can make myself happy in this moment, I will have the opportunity to do that later as well. Life is not linear. I can't check something off my to do list today for the rest of all time. Life takes turns, it is unexpected. I can only take comfort in being happy in this moment and the foreseeable future. If later on I am not happy, it will not be present selfs fault. I will make the decisions my heart wills me to make and treat those around me the best. that is all I can do. there is reality in future planners life, there is only the small and insignificant choices I make today and everyday and the life I am happy with at that moment.

pulled from the archives

I was going through old posts last night and find inspiration in my own words. 

side note. at the bar i went to they had these sailboat glasses that my parents used to have/might still own and all night i felt like i was in this weird universe where my childhood collided with being of age to drink. when the bartender handed me my first drink i was so taken back down memory lane that i walked away without actually paying for my drink. wait! this isn't my own house! im sorry mr. bartender, my parents don't make me pay for drinks you see...

++++++++
part of me is shutting down, and as opposites cosmically attract, i am discovering things about myself that i didn't think possible. i didn't know were in me to do. i know i am being so vague and pointing my finger in the air and trying to describe what it is that i'm touching. its just hard. its difficult to be honest with myself and with others and see both sides of the coin.

some days the future is right onfront of me. its the ground i'm about to step on, its waiting for the thumbs up without even needing to look back.

today is a day when the future is like looking through a paper tube. its there i can see it, i know i'll find it, its just beyond the next distance. the shaded curves on either side are rather hard to get though in the meantime. i'm already too far to look back now.

++++++++

lately i've been really touched by kindness in strangers. i think we unknowingly expect the worst from people and really, we are better then that, as a species. there were 4 times the maximum people that should ever be allowed on a single street car crammed into one car the other night and instead of scowling and pretending to be enthralled in the seat in front of her a lady told me i could rest my huge heavy gym bag on her lap instead of hovering it in the air because there was actually no place to put it. we started talking about the weather, about friends who live in better climates, about friends in general. i was sad to see my stop come up. i like moments like this and it makes me feel like there are actual humans living in toronto with me.

Photo +