this weekend is the american thanksgiving and I read a fair number of american based blogs who are gearing up for the holiday.
I have to say. I am extremely thankful for where my life is right now.
and you know what? I have to pat myself on the back and give myself full credit for that. I chose to make a change. I chose to take a leap of faith.
I had a lovely email with my cousin carly last night and she reminded me of how confused I was almost a year ago. I literally broke down in the bar and cried because I wasn't sure I was in love anymore. How do you know someone is the right one for you?
"You just know"
that advice stuck with me. there were SO SO SO many things i didn't know. I didn't know where I would live, how I would manage being on my own, how I could cope with the loneliness. but I knew that it wasn't fulfilling everything I needed. I knew I wasn't ready for the next steps (marriage, babies) because I couldn't commit to this person.
and the crazy thing is I see so many young women in the same predicament.
they are scared shitless of being alone and accept any company out of this fear.
and even men, I am told, struggle with this. they are scared of the unknown and would rather settle then face adversity.
because its no lie that being single is shitty. it comes with lonely nights and lots of pep talks in your head. its also easy to turn the other cheek and proclaim THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS LOVE. but thats not true either.
so my point is just this.
its your fucking life. be honest with yourself. listen to your needs.
give it everything you have and then some. and then look at the results. look VERY hard at the results.
make your life the best one for YOU.
this doesn't just apply to love. it can be your friendships, your relationships with family, your job, your living arrangements, your health.
make today the day you are honest with yourself and make the change you want to see.
because no ones going to do it for you, thats for sure.
I wish I could send this post to myself one year ago but my consolation is someone might read this today and really need to read this today and make it happen. please make it happen.
p.s. there is never a good time. just make it THE time.